Let’s take a break from the heavy observations of the contemporary scene and help you with your Christmas shopping, particularly if you have sports fans on your list.
How about t-shirts, sweatshirts, or replica jerseys from some unique teams? Your Christmas Shopping Advisor was prowling around on the internet the other day during the fifteen free minutes that our president was taking a breath or resting his thumbs and we found some teams your loved one would turn heads by wearing one of their t-shirts, caps, jerseys, or hoodies.
Some are based on movies or television shows:
Crash Davis’s Durham Bulls
and Corporal Klinger’s Toledo Mud Hens.
New York Knights, the fictional team of Roy Hobbs in The Natural
And for the female sports fan: Rockford Peaches—but no crying is allowed when wearing this shirt.
Minor league baseball teams:
Richmond Flying Squirrels
Hartford Yard Goats
Montgomery Biscuits
Modesto Nuts
Binghamton Rumble Ponies
Clinton Lumber Kings
Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp
Wichita Wing Nuts (although they folded in 2018)
Akron Rubber Ducks
Traverse City Beach Bums
Albuquerque Isotopes (the town is the home of the Atomic Museum)
New Orleans Baby Cakes
The Negro Leagues Baseball Museum in Kansas City has some great shirts or jerseys:
Homestead Grays
Kansas City Monarchs
New York Black Yankees
New York Elite Giants
Atlanta Black Crackers
Detroit Stars
Chicago American Giants
—and a lot of other great caps and other souvenirs
A few colleges:
University of California-Irvine Anteaters
Webster University Gorelocks—right here in Missouri
The University of Missouri-Kansas City Kangaroos
University of California Banana Slugs
Campbell Fighting Camels
Scottsdale Community College Fighting Artichokes
Presbyterian College Blue Hose
Youngstown State Penguins
Fort Wayne Mad Ants—actually it’s an NBA development league team
Hockey:
Toledo Walleyes
Halifax Mooseheads
Macon Whoopee
Odessa Jackalopes
Kentucky Thoroughblades
Lewiston Maineacs
Minot Minotaurs
And a wild card:
Thailand Tobacco Monopoly Football Club—we call it Soccer here.
We’ve also come across some great high school sports team names but we don’t know if any of them have t-shirts. But here’s an article from T. R. Robertson about some of the more unusual names he has come across. You might check various websites to see if the schools do have a potential gift for you.
http://www.thevistapress.com/unusual-and-creative-high-school-team-names/
The Washington Football team in the NFL is playing without a name this year after being the Redskins since 1933. Other teams with ethnic names at all levels and in all sports have come under some scrutiny from those who find the team names derogatory. What we have seen in these shopping suggestions, however, is that there is no lack of creativity in naming sports teams. We’re confident that they’ll find a new name in Washington. The Memorials. The Navy Yards. The Malls. The Air and Spaces. The K-Streeters. Maybe they could name themselves after the man who designed the city, the Washington L’Enfants. But probably not that one.
Or maybe they could name themselves after the city. The Washington Washingtons. After all, George was a pretty good quarterback in his day. Stood six feet-two. And he could throw. He did NOT throw a silver dollar across the Potomac River, which is about a mile wide at Mount Vernon, which is just south of town. But his step-son, Washington Parke Custis, claimed he once threw a piece of slate across the Rappahannock, and threw another one over a natural bridge 215-feet high.
Whatever, we hope this has helped those of you with sports fans in your family have a happy and an unusual Christmas.