Christa Pike woke up in a hospital shortly before she was declared brain dead and disconnected from life support. Those in the room were shocked but none so shocked as Christa Pike. “Where am I?” she asked. “Who are you?”
She had not expected to wake up, at least not on this side of the mysterious curtain. When her gurney was wheeled into the Tennessee execution chamber she said, “I’m going to leave this world the way I spent most of my life, and that is with love. I’m at peace. I’m ready to be free. This is a happy day.”
We do not know if she expected to wake up in Heaven but she woke up in the Hell of a continuing life, shackled to a bed, in pain from the drugs intended to kill her, damaged physically and perhaps mentally.
“I am at peace. I’m ready to be free,” she said in what she thought would have been the last minutes of her life—and that is why her confusion, but maybe mostly her anger, was immediately noticed.
Missouri prison officials always share the last words of inmates before their executions. We always reported them. We never mentioned the last meal. That just seemed ghoulish to me.
But the last words—-I saved them because, well, what would be your last words? Would they summarize your life or justify it or apologize for it? If you had spent decades in prison, might you not see your death as your escape, your relief, your freedom? If a faith journey that began too late to alter your life’s journey had left you feeling ultimate forgiveness, would you not think about what comes after the drugs stop your heart?
Here are some of those last words, some as the entire last statements and some as excerpts.
Read them out loud. You might be surprised about your reaction when you do that.
James Johnson, Jan 9, 2002: “The news reports today will say Jim Johnson is dead, those reports will be untrue. Today I will meet the one who gave his life for my sins. The one who extended to me mercy. Today I shall meet Jesus my Lord and Savior face to face. When the executioners have done their worst, God will be shown to have done his best. May the God of all grace bring peace to your hearts.”
Ernest Lee Johnson, October 5, 2021: “I am sorry and have remorse for what I do. I want to say that I love my family and friends, I am thankful of all that my lawer [sic] has done for me. They made me feel love as if I was family to them. I love them all, for all the people that has prayed for me I thank them from the bottom of my. I love the Lord with all my heard and soul. If I am executed I no were I am going to heaven. Becaus [sic] I ask him to forgive me.”
David Zink, July 14, 2015: “For those who remain on death row, understand that everyone is going to die. Statistically speaking, we have a much easier death than most, so I encourage you to embrace it and celebrate our true liberation before society figures it out and condemns us to life without parole and we too will die a lingering death.”
Michael Worthington, August 6, 2014: “I will finally get to live in peace with my true Father. I’ll no longer have to suffer. It’s really my beloved friends and family that will suffer. May God forgive those who call this justice. When in truth, it’s truly about politics and revenge. Amen and peace to unto you all.”
William Rousan, April 23, 2014: “My trials and transgressions have been many. But thanks be to my Lord and savior, Jesus Christ, I have a new home in his heavenly kingdom.”
Donald Jones, April 27, 2005: ” I’m finally free and I’m going home to grandmother now. I love you all and God bless.”
Jeffrey Sloan, February 22, 1996: “I know I’m going to a better place.”
When you know there is no other way out, no escape, no hope of ever being free from the horrible life of a prison—-
—when you have reconciled yourself that you will die—
—whether you believed before you committed your terrible crime that brought you this sentence or whether you found God in those lonely and limited years, that you will awaken in a new life—
And then you wake up in Hell twice over because your death was botched, maybe you would be angry, too. Certainly you’d be confused. And then would settle about you the knowledge that the system is going to help you recover enough that you will have to go through it again.
Christa Pike was released from the hospital Saturday. What’s next for her is unknown. A commutation to life without parole? She might be thinking that’s worse than death and that the executioners did her no favor.
She has gained a notoriety she never anticipated and of which she might not approve.
Christa Pike is the poster figure for those who want to eliminate the death penalty. We wonder if she will consider it an honor—
–if her mind is capable of comprehending it.