It’s an easy suggestion to make: Government should be run like a business. We first heard this piece of oratory so long ago we have forgotten when and we’re sure it wasn’t original then. So let’s test the validity of that idea. We’ll test it by reversing it. Suppose you ran your business the way Missouri government is run.
The first thing you would do because it would be popular with your customers is cut prices. Customers like free stuff and if it can’t be free, it should be priced as lowly as possible. People will like your store a lot because they will pay as little as possible for the merchandise. The best way to keep your prices low is to pay your employees as little as possible. Many won’t stay very long but that’s okay. There are always more where they came from.
Of course, your merchandise won’t be of the quality of some of your competitors because you’re holding down the prices and you couldn’t afford better merchandise anyway. Your customers won’t complain about the inferiority of the product until it falls apart on them when they need it the most. And their complaints will be easy to ignore because most of the others are satisfied with inferiority or mediocrity.
You won’t be able to pay for the new roof your store needs. The parking lot will develop cracks and potholes you can’t afford to fix. The place might not be as clean because there’s not enough money for a cleaning crew. A lot of your business equipment is outdated because you can’t afford new stuff that will speed up payment processes or handle orders. You don’t have the money to train employees to use the new equipment anyway. Your customers won’t mind the inefficiencies as long as you’re cheap enough.
You think about all of this for a while and you realize you’ll make the money you need to fix all of these problems if you just lower your prices some more, which will produce more customers who will in the long run spend more money. You also can get by with fewer employees. That will help you become more prosperous and shoppers won’t mind if there are fewer people to wait on them or fewer people who can help them find something or order something.
Yep. That’s the answer. Keep prices low. Don’t worry about quality. Don’t bother with retaining employees. People will love you because they don’t have to pay much. Of course, they won’t get much.
Run your business the way government is run. Watch government be run the way you run your business.
Prosperity is just around the corner!